So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize