She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
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