help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
