I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
Randomize
