It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
Randomize
