Midget sex pt 2 tonight
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
