ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
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