is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Randomize