i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Randomize
