Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
I had to cum in my sink.
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