There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
Randomize
