you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
It's no shave November. This is our time.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
Everclear isn't food dammit
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
Randomize
