so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
Randomize