Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
Randomize
