i just wanna soil my oats bro
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Randomize
