I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
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