Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
All I want is dick and wine.
Randomize
