the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
