ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
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