What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
Randomize
