feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
