Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
I have peed in a lot of sinks
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
Randomize
