Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
I love having hate sex.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
