no, he came in my armpit
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Randomize
