it hurts more in the daytime
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
Randomize
