Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
