she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize
