Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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