No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
Randomize
