If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
It was confusing and full of hummus
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize
