I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
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