I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
Randomize