Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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