I molested 6 butterflies tonight
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
Randomize
