i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
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