whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
