I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
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