I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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