He is such a slut. More and more my type.
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
zippers are such a cool invention
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
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