Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
This is classic penis vs brain.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
