Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
