Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
Randomize
