So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
Randomize
