seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
