I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
Betty ford says i'm here all night
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
You know you're sufficiently drunk when the 411 dude just says, "Fuck it! I'll Google that shit for you, what movie do you want to see?" and proceeds to give you showtimes for 3 different theatres.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
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