You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
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