Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
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