remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Top reasons to NOT leave jessica to her own devices : 1. Drinking becomes a competitive sport ( in which she is the only one competing) 2.big girl words= no worky 3. Whiskey refuses to be a good friend (as much as she insists ). 4. Waking up at six a.m. still in her swim suit is super awkward. 5. It isn't a fun game to figure out which person she gave her number to and 6. Yesterdays eyeliner doesn't look good today.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
Randomize
