Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Randomize