I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
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