You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
I seem to have left my pride at pride
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
Randomize
